What to say
Until strip clubs somehow turn into a silent disco people are going to keep talking in them. With that, guys’s(yes I am talking to you) have this desire to try and get to know the stripper sitting on their lap.
Yes, small talk should happen to make your experience better but there is a line in the sand on what you can talk about and what you should leave unsaid. Now let us dive into what would be acceptable to talk about and what we should keep in our heads and bury it deep down into the farthest filing drawer you have.
Everyone likes a good joke to laugh at and can definitely lighten up the mood and break that first awkward minute with her, or him, on your lap. Yes, we are in a strip club and the average moral meter is next to zero, with that said don’t go dark and twisted with your jokes. Let’s try and not scare the dancers away from us gentlemen.
Ask her how her night is going
Most women love when you talk about them and their day, you can never go wrong starting off with this one. Asking about their day/night shows that you care to some degree and aren’t there just to get your fix of a sexy woman rubbing all over you.
Just be normal for god’s sake. The more natural and comfortable you are the better the experience will be for both of you. Ask the dancer what they like to do when are not working or if they prefer dogs over cats. You got this, we believe in you.
Ask about places to check out (if on vacation)
If you are not from the area, ask her where some of her favorite spots to eat are or what is something only the locals do. This can open the door to a much broader and normal conversation.
non-personal but about her as much as possible
Make it about the dancer gentlemen, the more you talk about her and her likes and dislikes the better you are. Fish lightly when talking about personal topics, ask in a friendly way or state “if you don’t feel comfortable answering then don’t worry about it”. Always respect their likes and dislikes.
Pretty much anything you want to say
DON’T take this topic to far guys. Follow everything I have stated above and you will be fine. You will come across a few dancers that will be more open than others. Tread lightly, ask probing questions to get a feel of what you will and won’t get from them.
What not to say
Don’t be creepy, once you cross that line with one dancer be sure to know she will tell everyone else and no dances for you. Plus, security will be on your ass. It is not ok to talk about having sex with the dancers, asking for their phone numbers or where they live. Keep it light and playful otherwise, you might as well just go home.
Can I get a chance
Whatever the hell this means but, I am going to assume it means sex. NO, just flat out no. There is no quicker way of getting the dancer to get up and walk away. They are there to make money and go home, if they want to try and hook up they won’t do it at their place of work.
When do you get out
Remember when I mentioned “don’t be creepy”, this is exactly what I was referring to.
Don’t ask when she gets off work. If she wants you to know she will tell you. Most likely just to try and score one last dance before she heads home to go to sleep.
What’s your real name
Ok, I am even guilty of this one sometimes and that is ok. Sometimes you will get their real name only if you have earned it but, coming out of the gates by asking what their real name is first is a no-no. Let them tell you on their terms.
Can you introduce me to that girl
Hell no! Get your ass up and go talk to her yourself. You are basically asking her to go get another girl for you to give money to when she is sitting on your lap. Probably the closest thing to slapping them without actually slapping them.
Can I tip you by taking you out
What are we at a bar here? Again, no don’t do it. Just take the thought out of your head. How many times does a bartender get asked that and they laugh at you and walk away? It’s not ok to do big guy, sorry but you won’t be getting that lucky tonight.
Religion is always a touchy topic to discuss. Chances are with them being a stripper their religious morals are lacking but, that doesn’t mean Sally from church camp doesn’t value money and how fast she can make it. Stay away from this topic it will save you from a conversation you wish you never started.
Let me ask you this, would you tell a complete stranger while you are working about your family in detail? No? I thought so, moving on.
Your friends might enjoy you tripping on your face while trying to have a conversation about politics with a dancer who more than likely could have a higher degree than you. Politics fall into the same category as religion, avoid it.
Do you have a boyfriend
Oh why yes, I do, I would be so happy to tell you all about him…. Sike. Why ask? Are you desperate for her to annihilate your hopes and dream of hoping to go home with her? Refer back to “can I take you out as a tip “ and “family” for more help on this one.
Strippers job to make you feel good
I am sure every dancer’s first though for getting a job was to become a stripper. Highly unlikely but, I am sure they all have mixed feelings about being an exotic dancer. Sure, the money is ridiculous at most times but it comes with a certain type of work that may make them feel dissatisfied with themselves.
I personally know a few dancers who’s the only intention for dancing is to pay for their insane school loans while attending or even after graduating. It is truly hard to say no to a potential $500-$1000 night of work that is meaningless and not very difficult. It just depends on your level of comfort.
Let your money do the talking
This is king when it comes to strip clubs, without money why go? I get it that sometimes it is a place for a nightcap or the normal place to hang out with your friends but, at the end of the day if you don’t spend you don’t get dances or the company you are looking for. If you want the true stripper experience to be willing to spend some money on the girls.